omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
