How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize