it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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