Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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