if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
