FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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