We won't sleep together?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Bring me that man meat
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
