Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize