Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
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