I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
