I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
