Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Randomize
