On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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