I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I cannot find my penis.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize