We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize