I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.