Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN

  • TFLN Blog
  • Log In / Sign Up

Texts From Last Night

  • Nights:
  • Best
  • Worst
  • Random
  • About
  • Store
  • Today
  • Week
  • Month
  • All Time
  • Today
  • Week
  • Month
  • All Time
  • Favorite

    (541): View more from Oregon

    She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (12) Good night (430) Bad night (2707) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (203): View more from Connecticut

    have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

    (1-203): View more from Connecticut

    omg every time its on

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (25) Good night (2970) Bad night (984) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (423): View more from Tennessee

    By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (7) Good night (676) Bad night (2095) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (847): View more from Illinois

    You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (13) Good night (1709) Bad night (2994) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (540): View more from Virginia

    woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (26) Good night (936) Bad night (4459) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (713): View more from Texas

    I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (78) Good night (636) Bad night (2890) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (585): View more from New York

    Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (40) Good night (1492) Bad night (1775) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (405): View more from Oklahoma

    Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (27) Good night (419) Bad night (3175) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (214): View more from Texas

    On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.

    (1-214): View more from Texas

    You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (29) Good night (817) Bad night (2315)
  • Favorite

    (435): View more from Utah

    Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (57) Good night (8978) Bad night (913) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (828): View more from North Carolina

    what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (7) Good night (568) Bad night (2991) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (516): View more from New York

    Are you with Adam and his vodka?

    (1-516): View more from New York

    Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (29) Good night (4086) Bad night (494) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (224): View more from Illinois

    it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (11) Good night (630) Bad night (2557) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (571): View more from Virginia

    non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (74) Good night (13884) Bad night (1713) Order T-Shirt
  • Favorite

    (407): View more from Florida

    I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.

    Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

    Replies (13) Good night (3382) Bad night (754) Order T-Shirt
Go
  • Submit
  • Favorites
  • Text Us
  • Most Active Areacodes
  • Flickr
  • Twitter
  • (303): Colorado
  • (248): Michigan
  • (203): Connecticut
  • (703): Virginia
  • (310): California
  • (412): Pennsylvania
  • (630): Illinois
  • (847): Illinois
  • (610): Pennsylvania
  • (512): Texas
  • (617): Massachusetts
  • (330): Ohio
A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr A photo on Flickr
  • (859): The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow http://t.co/sQOeFAaf
  • (270): him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
  • (627): The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
  • (402): Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
  • (724): A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
  • (303): Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

Follow @tfln

View texts from the Archive
  • February, 2009
  • March, 2009
  • April, 2009
  • May, 2009
  • June, 2009
  • July, 2009
  • August, 2009
  • September, 2009
  • October, 2009
  • November, 2009
  • December, 2009
  • January, 2010
  • February, 2010
  • March, 2010
  • April, 2010
  • May, 2010
  • June, 2010
  • July, 2010
  • August, 2010
  • September, 2010
  • October, 2010
  • November, 2010
  • December, 2010
  • January, 2011
  • February, 2011
  • March, 2011
  • April, 2011
  • May, 2011
  • June, 2011
  • July, 2011
  • August, 2011
  • September, 2011
  • October, 2011
  • November, 2011
  • December, 2011
  • January, 2012
  • February, 2012
  • March, 2012
  • April, 2012
  • May, 2012
  • June, 2012
  • July, 2012
  • August, 2012
  • September, 2012
  • October, 2012
  • November, 2012
  • December, 2012
  • January, 2013
  • February, 2013
  • March, 2013
  • April, 2013
  • May, 2013

Find Us On:

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Stumbleupon
  • Digg
  • Reddit
  • 2953
  • 2954
  • 2955
  • 2956
  • 2957
  • … 3335
  • Next Page
Go
Site design by: MetaLab
  • Home
  • Best Nights
  • Worst Nights
  • Random
  • About
  • Store
  • Areacodes
  • Contact
  • Terms

© 2009-2012 Texts From Last Night Inc.