I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
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I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
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Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.