bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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