why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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