You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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