So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
