thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
