Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
