Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I want to have your abortion
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I have tasted many bathrooms
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
