oh god the rape fog is back!
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize