You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
