You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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