This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
