week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Everything about him screamed your future.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
