Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
