Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
