He is an equal opportunity slut.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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