We need to rekindle our bromance
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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