My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
