i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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