North Korea, Best Korea!
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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