Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
His hands were made for my vagina.
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I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
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If this party got busted it would be an improvement
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize