Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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