I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?