In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
