Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
