"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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