im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Randomize
