No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
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I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
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I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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