So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
