Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
