He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
