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  • 56 42
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 3:15am

    teehee, I admire you. Me too.

  • 63 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 18, 09 at 11:18pm

    A+. Also props on "schlong." Double props on being from the area.

  • 57 51
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 9:20am

    This is fucking hilarious. One of the only recent tfln that is actually funny/legit.

  • 49 39
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:28am

    +1 for the use of the word "schlong"

  • 46 36
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 3:20am

    I, too, have this dick envy.

  • 44 37
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:18pm

    haha i love you girls! i couldn't live without the laughs i get from you! :P

  • 51 52
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 12:42pm

    Wanna trade for a day? I've always wondered what it would be like to have girl parts. I can't promise "massive", but..... Unwanted and morning erections can be annoying

  • 53 59
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:42am

    schlong is a great word, and so is wang.

  • 46 47
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 8:14am

    I've been saying this for years.

  • 53 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 7:44pm

    I want a dick in my next life too... oh the things I could do with a light saber...

  • 50 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 8:56pm

    i just wish i could say SUCK MY DICK and have it WORK. cause "suck my tits" and "lick my cunt" just aren't the same.

    • 14 27
      Submitted by DerKarismatisch on Jul 1, 12 at 6:20pm

      I think "eat my ass" would work regardless of gender.

  • 43 44
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:36am

    Okay 1:27am, not only do I never meet the funny ones, I never meet the funny and hot ones.

  • 41 44
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 1:34am

    Careful what you wish for, having a big dick during everyday life is annoying as fuck. Try peeing in a toilet where the water nearly grazes the tip . That's REALLY annoying.

  • 46 55
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:27pm

    i had no idea that so many girls wanted to have a pleasurepole. gotta make them cry or you failed

  • 39 42
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 4:50am

    "for serious" im surprised this is not a 407 post

  • 46 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 2:00am

    Dude! Haha I say that all the time. Getting blowjobs and pissing on everything seems like it would be fun.

  • 50 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 13, 09 at 9:04pm

    ^it would be interesting if it weren't for that whole "getting people to let you" roadblock.

  • 37 40
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 9:33am

    You uhhh.....you girls know that if you want to have them, they DO have stores where you can buy relatively accurate copies of them. Even ones with handy straps for secure attachment.

  • 48 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 11, 09 at 5:09pm

    i have dick envy. it seems so interesting :P go around fucking people

  • 34 38
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 3:50am

    i have dick envy too haha

  • 34 44
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:27am

    haha you guys just dont think the funny ones are attractive, thats all.

  • 37 51
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 2:01am

    Unless your dick hangs straight down from the bottom of your crotch, you'd have to be about 11" flaccid for it to drape over your balls and dangle the tip near the water line in most toilets.

  • 33 43
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 7:14pm

    having a dick would be serious fun... slapping bitches with it would be first on my list of things to do

  • 35 47
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 8:39am

    If I had a dick I would slap someone with it.

  • 33 44
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 7, 09 at 3:14am

    hahahhahaa i feel the exact same way!!!

  • 45 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 22, 09 at 8:44pm

    my friend always says that she wants to be a guy in the next life and "the first thing i'd do was slap a nun in the face with it"

  • 34 50
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 3:05am

    Maybe you just go to sleep high

  • 43 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 2:30am

    i told my ex-bf i wish i had a dick. he thought i was weird. i'm with 2:00. i feel like having a dick is more fun.

  • 36 55
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:26am

    bahahaha i always say that too

  • 33 52
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 6:20pm

    theres alot of chicks who wanna be reincarnated into a guy with a huge penis , im so on that train as well i just wanna play with my own penis one day

  • 40 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 5:28am

    penis envy now - short haired man hating feminist in 10 years time.

  • 33 53
    Submitted by alyybooo on Jan 2, 11 at 4:35pm

    Guys have it so easy. Definitly agree with this

  • 28 43
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 3:03am

    I love a girl who is funny, and I'm from the 440. Life's too short to be stuck on things -- I know that I love to laugh, and I love making other people laugh. if I fall asleep at night and I'm smiling, then I consider it a successful day.

  • 33 55
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 1:24am

    This chick is funny. I never meet the funny ones.

  • 17 26
    Submitted by NYCdood on May 8, 12 at 2:11pm

    So you want to be me?

  • 28 51
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 6, 09 at 3:16am

    I'm so with 2:00 and 2:30... having a cock would be great! I am not ashamed to admit that I have penis envy!

  • 37 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 12, 10 at 6:58pm

    Lmfao!!!

  • 30 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 23, 10 at 6:28pm

    No doubt!!!!