Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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