She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
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Life is too short to drink crap you have to chase.
This is in the sticks outside Sacramento. Duh. I'm sure this guy's dick would get hard if she spit her chew at it. And if she didn't take her Carhart off when they fucked.
Sounds like a good recipe for a fat alcoholic wife in ten years. Maybe less time...
If its all alcoholic whipped cream, consider marriage and/or AA.